Even After Death
by Eclarexoxo
Summary: -Collaboration with TurboWiz70- After Cam's suicide, Maya has become a wreck. She suffers from depression, cuts, and isolates herself in an attempt to try and cope with the loss. But what happens when a miracle comes her way? Is she crazy, or is this a gift from showing her compassion towards Cam? -On Hiatus until further notice-
1. Free At Last

Author's Note: Hey! Guess who's back, back again? I am back, so tell a friend! Here's a brand new story, but I'm not alone! My girl Turbo has agreed to collaborate with me! We're so excited to get this rolling, we have tons of great ideas for it! Now a message from Turbo!

A/N: Hi everyone! So guess who is now collaborating with Eclarexoxo? Me! I am so excited to be working with this wonderful writer. I hope you all enjoy reading this. Read, review, enjoy!

And now it is our great pleasure to present to you, the very first chapter of Even After Death! Also please check out our individual stories too! If We Hold On Together and Scars and Secrets!

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Evan After Death

One: Free At Last

_"You went crazy."_

_"You're a psycho."_

_"The whole team is counting on you Cam, YOU."_

_"Stop being so selfish!"_

_"And stop crying where everyone can see you, it's embarrassing."_

_"I'm tired."_

_"I just wish I could go to sleep and never wake up."_

_"It just sucks that Maya's gonna have to deal with it."_

_"And if you cared about her at all, then you'd get out of her life now. Forever."_

Those were the words that were forming inside Cam's head as he sat on the front steps of Degrassi. What had he done to deserve all of this? He was screwed up, and everyone knew. He was just a stupid, psychotic, fifteen year old boy. He was all alone and had no one to lean on. His last source of happiness would be ripped away from him if he stayed any longer. He couldn't put Maya through this; she didn't deserve any of it. He really cared for her, he always would, and he hoped that she would forgive him for what he was about to do.

Cam reached his hand into his pocket and pulled out Hoot. He stared at the stuffed animal, an image of Maya appearing in its adorable face. Tears brimmed his eyes and spilled out over his cheeks; he gasped a breath and hugged the owl tightly to his chest. He wouldn't be alone now, he had one last little piece of Maya that he could hold on to.

_"Can I tell you a secret? Tonight's the most fun I've had since I've been at Degrassi."_

_"I have a secret too. I don't like hockey."_

_"Me neither."_

_They were about to lean in when Cam suddenly turned away._

_"Um Katie's probably looking for us we should probably go find her."_

_"I thought about what you said, the other day. And I was nervous too. I've never had a girlfriend before and I-I really wanted to. I just, I didn't know-." Cam leans in and captures her in a kiss, they pull away and both smile at each other._

_"Look I had a lot of fun last night but, we're different. Music's your thing, sports is mine." Maya sighs._

_"Well, everybody's different from everybody and that's what I like about us." She gently touches his jacket, causing him to smile and rub her arm._

_"Yeah, me too."_

_"She always looks pretty." Cam kisses Maya's hand._

_"Tu es très belle." Cam smiles at her, causing Maya to smile._

_"Well, it's not going to help you during your exam but." They kiss._

_"I'm terrible at telling you things but, I like you. A lot." Cam reached up and held out the bracelet. "This charm is for your concert tonight. Every time you play a show, I'll get you a new one."_

_"I love it!" He wrapped the bracelet around her wrist._

_"Well I'll admit it was my mom's idea, but I picked it out."_

_"When we broke up you were confused but, then you came back to me so. Are you still confused?"_

_"No I want you. I've always wanted you." Cam pulls her in for a kiss._

_"Good, I'm not gonna let you get away that easily."_

_"And you need to get your own stuffed animal."_

_"Oh, I don't know, can't it just be you? You're owl like."_

_"Shut up!" Maya playfully smacks Cam as they giggle._

Those were the last thoughts Cam wanted on his mind . . . thoughts of Maya and all the good times they had together. She was the only highlight of his life here, yet she was also the reason he had to do this. Zig was right; he needed to get out of her life.

But doing this was the only way.

After checking to be sure nobody – particularly Maya – was around him, he put Hoot (who was secured in his small box) on the side of the steps before stepping away from it . . . his decision was final.

He lurked like a ghost through the hallways, not caring that his shoulders were bumping against the bodies of others. He was moving slowly across the halls, his mind knowing where he was moving while the rest of his body went numb. His decision was made . . . his fate was sealed . . . there was no going back . . .

Within a matter of minutes, he was feeling the wind on his face as he breathed in the oxygen. His feet crunched against the gravel, shaking that this was the only way for the pain to go away . . . it was the only way for those around him to stop putting up with him and all his mistakes. It was not fair on him to be treated so badly and it was not fair for him to cause people nothing but stress.

He was so close when he felt his phone vibrate from inside his pocket. He told himself that he should ignore it, for it could have been Dallas telling him to man up again or Zig to restate his views.

Cam soon realized that it did not matter who it was or what they would say. Nothing could have made him feel worse than he was right now, so maybe having one last interaction with the world would not have harmed him.

But he was wrong.

_Where are u, cheesy?_

It would be from Maya . . . of all the other people it could have been, it had to be her. He began to shake, hating himself for what he was about to do.

_I'm not coming. Sorry. It's over._

Tears fell out of his eyes, knowing that he had just hurt someone who he really cared about . . . someone who really cared about him. Not wanting to even see anything that she could possibly say in reply, he stepped closer to the edge of the roof; continuing to shake, he held his phone out in front of him. He dropped his phone and watched it fall then seeing hit the concrete and break seconds later.

It did not take long for the phone to die and he wondered if it would be just as fast for him. He hoped it was . . . he did not want to suffer anymore. He took in a trembling breath, tears going down his face when he got to the edge of the roof. His toes were lingering over the edge and one more step forward would have sent him into a free fall . . .

And that's what he wanted.

This was it. There was no turning back now. If there was a time to do this, he had to be now before he brought anymore disappointment to the lives of others around him.

"I'm sorry Maya . . ."

He fell through the air, his life soaring before his eyes . . .

And then it was over.


	2. He's Never Coming Back

Author's Note: The support for this story already is overwhelming! I'm having way too much fun with Turbo on this! Great things are about to come! This, I promise you! I honestly believe that our idea will be the very first Maybell story to do this! So beware of the future chapters!

A/N: Thank you everyone for the support you've given us so far! It is all greatly appreciated! I am truly having a great time working with Eclarexoxo right now and I'm pleased with our work process, so I am very excited to see your reactions. Here's the next chapter. Read, review, enjoy!

Thanks to Degrassigirl101, k.j. darkly, TheOceanCrumb, ForeverFan13, CosmicRain, Courtbug3395 and to all the people that are following and favoriting this story! On behalf of Turbo and myself, we present chapter two!

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Evan After Death

Two: He's Never Coming Back

_"I'm sorry about your loss."_

_"Cam was a great hockey player."_

_"He'll be dearly missed."_

_"Are you okay?"_

_Cards._

_Flowers._

_Sorrow._

That was all Maya heard since_ it_ happened. Everyone kept sending their thoughts, telling her how sorry they were that she lost her boyfriend, even sending her flowers, cards, and gifts of some sort. The whole school slowly stopped being in mourning and it's already been a week. It's like they just forgot about their ex star hockey player. But that's the way Maya liked it, she wanted Cam to be forgotten about. She didn't want to forgive him for what he did, just up and abandoning her like it was nothing, like their entire relationship didn't matter to him. He had been selfish. Never once did he give a thought about her, she could of helped him! Why wouldn't he let her? Did she really miss the signs that something was wrong? But she had tried repeatedly and it's like his brain hadn't processed it clear enough. Maya was suddenly snapped out of her thoughts by the sound of a feminine voice.

"Maya!" She turned towards her best friend Tori, and Tristan who were standing there with worried expressions on their faces.

"Huh? Sorry, what did you say Tor?"

"I asked if you were okay. You seemed really out of it for a second." Maya sighed before slamming her locker shut. She turned towards her best friend and nodded, before faking a smile.

"Yes, I'm fine. I've been alright actually." Tristan frowned and looked towards Tori, worry clearly glowing in his eyes.

"Yeah, but this isn't like you My."

"Trust me I'm fine."

"Well we're here for you if you ever want to talk." _Talk._ Not like there was much to talk about. The deal was sealed.

"Thanks. I got to get to class though, see you." She pushed passed them and rushed off, desperately trying to get these thoughts out of her mind. Ever since her and Tori made up, she's been on her case, asking if she was alright, if there was anything she could do for her; In fact everyone has, and Maya was pretty much sick of it. She did not want sympathy from people. Just because her boyfriend killed himself doesn't mean she should be in the spot light all of a sudden. Sure he was famous, but why should she be? Of course this was how the spouses or boyfriends or girlfriends of a celebrity were treated when their loved ones die.

Maya raced around a corner and found herself in a deserted hallway, she breathed a sigh of relief and looked around, hoping to have some time to herself. She started to walk down the hallway before abruptly coming to a stop. She soon realized exactly where she was, she was in _his_ hallway. Maya slowly walked more and came to a stop, she turned to face the row of lockers as her eyes stopped on _his_ locker.

Tears blurred her vision as she gently reached out and gripped the combination lock. A sudden memory coming to her.

_"Hey!" _

_"Can you stop doing that?" _

_"Can I help you?" _

_"Well I think, last night. We discovered you have a hidden talent. Tristan gave me this. The musical needs more chorus members, they're holding auditions." _

_"Not on your life." _

_"Come on, did you not hear yourself last night? The way you handled those false set of notes? It was amazing."_

_"Yeah that's because there was no pressure. It didn't matter if I won or if I lost." _

_"You don't really win in karoake." _

_"You know what I mean. Look, I had a lot of fun last night. But, we're different. Music's your thing, sports is mine." _

_"Well, everybody's different from everybody and that's what I like about us." _

_"Yeah, me too." _

Maya quickly wiped her tears and shook her head. She didn't want this, and being here made memories. Good memories. She had to get out of here, she felt like she couldn't breathe. Maya stood, deciding to just skip her final class and go home for the day. It's not like anybody would notice, right? She quickly rushed to her locker and gathered her things before sneaking out the back door. As she started walking, she saw herself looking towards the roof where he did it. She felt her hands begin to tremble but she squeezed them together. She was not going to be weak, not one bit. Maya rushed past the building, not once looking back.

_"I'm very to have to tell you this, Maya . . . Campbell Saunders is dead."_

_She sat there, stone-faced and emotionless as these words floated into her brain._

_"O-Oh my God," Katie breathed beside her. "O-Oh my God."_

_"It appears that he committed suicide in the greenhouse sometime overnight. Um . . . a student found him about an hour ago."_

_"Wait, there – no, th-there's a mistake. Uh, I just saw him the other day. Cam is obviously fine," she managed to say despite her shock._

There was not a mistake. Cam was dead . . . and she was made of stone for the rest of the day. She thought of her audition, how Cam made a stupid choice, and how everyone should stop blaming themselves since it was Cam's fault and Cam's fault alone. She did not feel any regret or wrong in thinking of these things and for stating how she felt to others around her. For days she stood by her statements . . .

Today was different.

She was practicing – well, attempting to practice – her cello in her room. The bow went back and forth against the strings while her fingers traveled to create the chords. But Maya was not aware of how poorly the instrument was singing; all she could hear were Principal Simpson's words playing in her head over and over . . . and over . . . and over . . . and over.

_Dead._

_Dead._

_Dead._

Trembling and breathing heavily, Maya felt the bow slip from her fingers and she was barely aware of the crash the cello made as gravity led it to the floor. Although she had been aware of Cam's death for a few days, it never really registered to her what it meant . . . until now.

He was dead. He was gone. He was never coming back. She would never hear his voice again, hold his hand, kiss his lips, hug him, watch videos into the middle of the night, or do anything with him again. All she could do was think of him and recall the memories she had . . . and with all those thoughts will come the reminder of how she would never see him again.

Maya cried for the first time since she learned of Cam's suicide. The tears were racing down her face, she was sobbing hard, and she was struggling to breathe. She fell out of her chair and onto the floor, curling into the fetal position.

She did not think of how he took his life, how he did not seek help, or how he made the choice that made so many behind. All she thought about was how he was gone and he was never coming back . . . he left her alone.

"Maya!"

Katie sprinted into her sister's room. She knelt down beside her and tried to sooth her sister, barely noticing the broken neck on the cello.

"Maya!" she said, smoothing her hand over her spine while she held her shoulder with the other to make an attempt to looking at her eyes. "Maya, are you okay?"

"NO! I'M NOT OKAY!" she screamed. "CAM'S DEAD!"

"Maya," she said softly, wishing that she could say something to ease her pain. "It was his choice, remember?"

"H-He could have talked to me! He could have talked to me!" she cried.

"I know, I know," Katie whispered. "But it's going to be okay."

"We were doing fine! We were so happy together! I would have been there for him! Why did he have to do it? Why?" she screamed hysterically.

"Shhh," she soothed her. "Shhh."

With difficulty, Katie guided Maya to sit up; within seconds, Maya was crying into Katie's shoulder. She wanted nothing more than for it to be Cam holding her, caressing her back and whispering words in her ear.

"It'll be okay, Maya."

"I thought he cared about me! Why did he leaving me behind? He should have thought about how much this would hurt me!"

"He was sick," Katie reminded her once again. "I know you think he should have fought, but –."

"I want him back! That's all I want! I want him back!"

Maya cried for hours, speaking from her heart and sometimes speaking nonsense. Maya clung to Katie as she cried, eventually falling asleep sometime around midnight; Katie kissed the top of her sister's head, watching her as she escaped the pain through sleep . . .

But she was not the only one watching over Maya . . .


	3. Avoiding Her Problems

Author's Note: I really appreciate the feedback that this story is getting! Sorry for the long wait, but it's here now!

A/N: Hey everybody! Thank you so much for the feedback and support that you are sending in! It is so great to see it all :D Sorry that the update took forever (I take complete responsibility for that). I hope that you guys find that this chapter was worth the wait. So, without further ado, read, review, enjoy!

Thanks to missindegrassi, Mutational, degrassigirl101, ForeverFan13, CosmicRain, TheOceanCrumb, k. , and LNCrow for reviewing! Also thanks to the people that followed and favorited!

May we present! Chapter three! Enjoy!

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Evan After Death

Avoiding Her Problems

_Maya._

_Wake up, Maya._

The alarm clock awoke Maya from her slumber. She slammed her hand down on the object before slowly opening her eyes and sitting up. Another dream had plagued her mind. Cam was in it, and he was calling her. She was following the sound of his voice, and had thought she almost reached him when she was awakened.

_Damn you alarm clock! _

She crawled out of bed and stretched, shaking her head so she would wake up more. She walked towards the bathroom and looked at herself in the mirror, she looked like a mess. Dark circles were covering her eyes, her hair was sticking up at all ends, and she looked pale as a ghost. Maya sighed before walking back to her room. She really didn't feel like going to school today.

Maybe she could skip today, then she wouldn't have to deal with more sympathy that she didn't want.

"Maya, are you awake? It's time to get ready for school!" Katie's voiced called from downstairs. Maya quickly thought up a plan to get out of leaving and quickly went to the bathroom to retrieve a hot water bottle. She filled it with hot water and hoped that Katie wasn't coming up the stairs right now. Once it was full, she raced back to her room and jumped back into bed, placing the hot water bottle on her head so it seemed like she had a fever.

After a few minutes, she pulled the bottle away and felt her forehead. It was warm enough. She quietly got up and placed the object under her bed, far enough so Katie wouldn't see it. Sure enough, her sister's voiced called to her again.

"Maya, come on! Rise and shine!" She heard her coming up the stairs and quickly pulled the covers over her body and pretended to be asleep.

"Maya, come on it's seven forty five." She knocked on her door and walked in. "Maya?" Maya felt Katie shake her a little, she turned over and moaned before shoving the blankets over her head.

"What? I want to sleep."

"Come on sunshine, you're going to be late for school."

"Katie, please stop shouting." Maya faked, trying to hide her smile.

"I'm not shouting, are you okay?" She walked over and ripped the warmth from Maya again, feeling her forehead. "Yikes! You feel warm. Let me get the thermometer." She walked away and into the bathroom. Maya sighed, her plan had worked. She was about to receive her ticket to get out of school.

Katie came back and placed the thermometer in her mouth, Maya leaned back and closed her eyes. A sudden thought came to her, what if the thermometer didn't pick up the heat from her head? Katie's smart, she would know about her plan and make her go.

Suddenly, Katie's phone rang. She walked out and went to retrieve her phone. This bought Maya a little bit of time, she quietly snuck to the bathroom and ran the thermometer under hot water until it read a hundred and one. She then went back and waited for her sister.

"Sorry My, that was Marisol. She's going to give us a ride today." She pulled the thermometer out of her mouth and sighed. "Well I guess I'm going alone, you're not going today. I'll call mom and tell her you're sick."

"I'm sorry." Maya leaned back in her bed, while Katie fixed the blankets and tucked her back in.

"No, don't worry about it. You can't help it when you get sick. Feel better, okay?" Katie kissed the top of her sister's head and then left her room. Maya did a silent cheer and rolled back over to catch up on some much needed sleep.

Despite yet another unsettling dream she had about Cam, Maya was able to awake sometime later, feeling fully refreshed although she was probably only asleep for a couple of hours. She rubbed her eyes before sitting up and stretching, wondering what she could do with her hours of freedom. She would definitely be able to practice some of her instruments and write some music, maybe even just take a day to be completely lazy and just watch some television.

Deciding that she would do that, Maya put on her glasses before sliding out of bed; she moved out of her room and to the kitchen, wanting to satisfy her stomach's hunger. After pouring herself some cereal, she journeyed to the living room in hopes that watching a rerun or pointless soap opera would distract her from the thoughts of Cam and her dreams.

She soon found that this was not going to happen. She sat down on the couch and turned on the television . . . and the first thing she saw on the screen was a hockey game. Her stomach did a painful flip and her heart turned to stone. She began to shake, her thoughts immediately turning to her favorite hockey player . . . the only one she actually cared about. Maya was trembling so much that the milk in the cereal was starting to jump onto the floor and couch . . . the couch that they cuddled on together during their last hours together.

"Damn it," she grumbled as she put her bowl to the side, trying to keep her tears at bay. She could not believe that a simple couch could bring back memories for her . . . then again it was where they exchanged their last kiss . . . their last embrace . . . their last everything . . .

She stood up, leaving the TV on and her bowl full. She rushed from the living room to her bedroom, hurriedly changing into some jeans, a shirt, and a jacket. She did not bother with much else; all she focused on was getting out of the house. There were too many memories here, whether they came from Cam's presence or if it just reminded her of the funny texts or sweet calls he made her.

Within minutes she was walking down the street, ear buds in her ears. The clouds were hanging low and there was a cold breeze, but Maya did not pay mind to it once she zipped up her jacket. Keeping her hands in her pockets and the hood covering her head, she walked down the street. She kept her head down, observing the pattern of the concrete and her shoes when they came into her vision. She only spoke when she accidentally ran into someone; she muttered a brief "sorry" and went on her way.

Maya was taking this walk, hoping that it would take her mind off Cam . . . but being alone attracts thoughts, especially the ones no one wants to have. No matter how many steps she took or how many buildings she saw, he was still the first and only thing on her mind. She did not care about anything else; Cam was all that was in her mind and all the memories were haunting her. She felt low and miserable; she felt as though she was simply a soul that inhabited her body and that some great force was moving her like a marionette since she was incapable of moving herself.

She was on edge the whole time she walked, but one incident brought her crashing down. She was walking and weeping within, looking at her feet. Needing to look at something new, she turned her head up . . . and she found herself looking through the window of Little Miss Steaks. Her breath got caught in her throat as she stepped closer to it; she began to breathe so heavily that her breath fogged up the window.

Maya instantly thought of the time she and Cam took the stage for karaoke, smiling and having the time of their lives. Everything was right then; he may have had hockey on his mind and he was probably feeling out of place, but singing together made that disappear. They were in harmony . . . peace . . . bliss . . .

Sniffling, Maya rubbed her eyes under her glasses. She released a sob before turning away from the window, wishing that she would have just stayed at home and remained in the domain that was her bed. She took a breath before lowering her hands and looking up.

She gasped at who was standing a few feet in front of her, but she could see him through the tears. She recognized the hoodie . . . she recognized the brown hair . . . she recognized the face . . . she recognized the eyes . . .

_"Cam."_


End file.
